Death Of A Bastard

bruised by love
battered by breakups
i was down and out
never to get up

then i found an inner strength
by killing my consciece
i stood up on my feet
pulverizing my oldself

a bastard came into being
selfish in its own right
not giving a damn
nor showing any mercy

it felt wierd at first
but soon it became second nature
and i embraced
not being accountable

at a time when i least expected
in a place i hardly spent time
you came into my life
when i was betting for disaster

so the fightback began
to regain my lost soul
my heart yearned to break free
from the chains i've put on

now i stand here with hope
which you've inflicted upon
you gave me the weaponary
in the form of love, compassion

i made the most of it
to rid what was not me
so here i am celebrating
the death of the bastard

Pretend

i want to tell you
that i'm stuck
in a mess
and i can't get out

but the words
wont come out
the fear of loosing you
holds it back

so i pretend
that everyting is ok
fake a face
that i'd never have

i'm clueless
and i'm dying here
it sucks that
i cant get out

all i want is
to speak my heart out
and set it free
but i cannot

Comfort Zone

we come home
escaping the outside world
and watch some tv
have home cooked dinner

bubble baths
whilst sipping red wine
falling asleep
all cuddled up

she's the first thing
that i see every morning
and i'm amazed
by how she makes me feel satisfied

everything is
just the way it should be
a picture perfect scenario
but then i think to myself

should i get down
on one knee
or should i leave
the door open

The Fall

walking towards the edge
makes me want to free fall
and it suprises me
how i'm not scared at all

so i shall fall
with a smile on my face
pushing away everything and everyone
at peace on my own

i might not be reluctant
yet in these dying minutes
i look for my reason
to prevent me from falling

i never cared much
of how things would end
though my conscience doesn't allow me
to leave things unfinished

so maybe my reason
is not you or them
rather to fill the void
that i've always seen around me

Red

we thought it was love
so we painted it all red
it seemed like a great way
to celebrate our love

we were in a rush
eager to shout out loud
to tell the world
that we were in love

maybe it was too soon
maybe it was misread
too many maybe's
too little feelings

it's still all red
though we are mourning
a bleeding heart
instead of celebrating

Helpless In Bed

his rough hands
smothers her velvet skin
unable to break free
she shivers in fear and disgust

using all her might
she pushes him back
running for her life
is all she can do

like a starved savage beast
he pounces on her
whilst she screams in agony
he tries to find pleasure

her eyes filled with tears
she looks for compassion in his eyes
but none she can find
as he gives an unmerciful glance

all out of chances
all out of hope
she stares at the blank wall
lying helpless in bed

If You Let Me

what would you do
if i were to come there
and hold you tight
in the moonlight

would you push me away
and run far away
or would you hold me tight
in this cold night

let the cold breeze
blow your hair
across my face
whilst i kiss your neck

and we shall lie
amongst the wildflowers
and wake up
to it's sweet scent

i would do it everyday
if you let me in
because i want to
grow older with someone like you

Children Of The War

born and raised
at gunpoint
we were taught to follow
not to think

they were our parents
they were our gods
everything was laid out
in simple black and white

but now it has changed
the chains broken
taught only to follow
now we look for guidance

unable to think
on our own
we are caught in constant dilemma
lost without our voices

if you broke the chains
teach us how to stand on our feet
or forever we shall be
the children of the war

Something's Don't Change

something's don't change
even though how hard i try
something's won't wait
till i try to figure it out

so i have to mess it up
when it's worth trying harder
that's why i haven't changed
because i'm always a disappointment

that is why
even though i don't know
what i am doing
i'm sure about the outcome

when everything is uncertain
one thing is certain
i just throw it all away
when i should b holding on to it

There You Weren't

there you were
lying next to me
hair fallen
across your beautiful face

i move it back
to look into your eyes
trying to understand
how you make me feel this way

i put in an effort
to stay still
fighting the urge to kiss you
scared that i'll ruin this moment

even in your sleep
you leave me breathless
even in my dreams
you still mesmerize me

there you weren't
lying next to me
you've left without a trace
like you said you wouldn't